The folks you choose to stand by you as you say “I Do”, have no doubt been by your side for many of the wonderful ups and downs of your life. They are your best friends, your college roommates, your siblings, your childhood pals. They know you, they love you, and they are so happy for you.
While wedding parties can add so much joy to the wedding planning process, we have also seen wedding parties add stress. We have even seen wedding planning end some wonderful friendships. Here are a few things to keep in mind when making your plans. Follow these tips and hopefully the folks you choose to be in your wedding party will be by your side after the wedding for the incredible things still ahead.
Numbers don’t matter, you do you boo!
We have seen so many brides and grooms sacrifice who they ask to be an attendant because they were worried about having the same numbers on both sides, or they were concerned about having too many, or two few people. Just keep it simple folks, ask your favorite people. Nothing else matters.
Communicate with your wedding party, but not too much
Definitely keep your wedding party informed, but remember they have a lot going on in their lives. Make sure they know where they need to be, when they need to be there, and what they need to be wearing. Otherwise respect the fact that while they are over-the-moon happy for you, they still have their own lives going on, and that is where their attention needs to be. Try not to blow up their email boxes every week with updates.
Keep prices in check
Holy cow, being in a wedding is expensive. Between the showers, bachelor and bachelorette parties, travel, pre-wedding festivities, attire, gifts, hair and and make up, and the happy hours that keep you sane during the planning process; it all adds up so quickly. If you aren’t mindful of this, your besties could easily end up spending hundreds and even thousands to be a part of your wedding.
When making plans that impact the wallets of your wedding party, be kind. Remember that everyone has different financial situations and things add up quickly. We have seen relationships sour over finances and wedding related expenses. Avoid that happening to you by keeping your requests affordable to everyone.
Take a wedding break with friends too
“As a wedding planner, I recommend taking breaks from talking about the wedding with your partner. The same is true with your friends,” Kim at Your Perfect Bridesmaid, a local wedding planning company says. While it’s understandable if the wedding occupies your every waking moment, don’t expect it to be the same for your friend. Don’t lose the well-rounded, caring, interesting, person you were before you got engaged. And don’t stop being a great friend. It is your day, but it cannot be all about you, all the time.
Remember to check in with your friends about what is going on in their lives and their relationships. There will most definitely be times during the wedding planning process where you will need your wedding party. But there will also be times during wedding planning where they will need their friend. Make sure you are there for them too!
Your wedding party is not free labor
While your wedding party will move Heaven and Earth for you, they want to have fun on your wedding day too. Avoid assigning too many tasks to your attendants. Be sure to hire a coordinator to take care of the set up, decorating, and clean up, so that your favorite people can be on the dance floor with you. To find incredible Wedding Planners and Day-of Coordinators, visit our vendor guide.
In closing, your friends and family know you are excited, and they are so excited for you. They are also very honored to stand by your side as you marry your partner and best friend. With that being said, they really don’t want to go broke or crazy standing there! Keep it simple and fun, so everyone will have a memorable time.
All images used in this post by Sweetlife Photography
The Art of Weddings Portland strongly recommends you hire a professional wedding planner that is experienced and connected to the top vendors in the community. You can find the full list of our favorite Portland planners, venues, and vendors in our vendor guide! Follow us on Instagram at @artofweddingspdx too!
You should also keep your eye on The Venue Crawl event. Wedding planning has never been so much fun! Follow on Instagram at @portlandvenuecrawl and check it out.